Fidelity Investing Advice for Everyone

Whatever your level of experience with money, it is always good to get back to the brass tacks once in awhile. That’s a reference to the strip that goes down on the concrete, before laying the carpet, for all of you white collar workers out there. No matter if you have a hard time saving or if you already have a decent nest egg, you better take an interest in your money working the hardest and making the most for you. The worst mistake to make with money is letting it sit idle and unemployed. While there is something to be said about the safety in keeping a certain sum tucked away, in a safe or in the form of bullion, I don’t want to get lost in that argument. With that, take two percent post-tax and hide it. Let’s move on. I am in no way a representative for Fidelity but I have become an advocate. I’ve found Fidelity to offer the most comprehensive structure for growing finances available. I can say that because I have tried nearly every platform out there. Etrade, Robinhood, Stash,…

Am I odd for smiling when I know the joke is on me?


     Am I odd for smiling when I know the joke is on me? Very few people have quite the ability to make me laugh as I do for myself.
     I once occupied an outpost while fantasizing over doing a number two as I readied myself to become a Navy Seal with Bud/s class 243 in Coronado, California. I had been the lucky recipient of night watch duty just before hell week and was looking forward to starting my sleepless week of rigorous exercise on no sleep to begin with.
     The rules are simple on watch. Don't abandon your post.

     Being as the twin towers had just been struck down, we were considered under a time of war, and the word was that abandoning your post during such time was a sentence of death.
     I can't remember how long the watch lasted but I do recall the regrets I felt for sneaking out with a couple of the guys for drinks the night before, because they were manifesting as a severe urge to drop a deuce right in the middle of my duty. Of course, I was busy wondering what was one to do in a situation like this, and the only obvious remedy was the same as I had always heard since boot camp, "Just suck it up." Pun intended.

     Many years later I occupied the restroom stall at O'Brien's Bistro where I was working as a short-order chef and I had been reminiscing about my time in the Navy while passing a pebble or two in the porcelain. I asked myself what might had happened had I not had the willpower to hold my diligent doo that fateful night, and that is where the joke came from that appears in, "The Mind is a Funny Thing".

     What would my instructor have said to me had I shit my pants on night watch? I'm sure it would have something to do with my being relieved of doodie!
     When the joke came to me I sat there and chartled (a coordinated chuckle and fart). Hurriedly then, I had finished up my business and headed back to work while perfecting the pun for delivery to my peers. To read it rightly you would have to get a copy of the old joke book, but it goes to show that even the most horrible things you do to yourself are somehow an insane means to an end.
     Perhaps the greatest men are self-contained? What a revelation it would be to find out that the underdog always wins. Kinda like how when you take your kids to the circus and they laugh at the clown's antics and misfortunes, all the while the clown is often the most amazing gymnast and daredevil under the whole bigtop.

-Jay M Horne
Jay Horne is an author and publisher out of Bradenton, Florida who has shared a genuine interest in philosophy and martial arts since early childhood. He is a husband and father of four.

View all of his professional and philosophical works of literature on his Amazon author page where you will find blogs, videos, and free excerpts:

Jay M Horne


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